Inviting an ex to your wedding is like opening a Pandora’s box of emotions. It’s an acknowledgement that the past is an integral part of who you are, and your journey is shaped by it. Also, it’s a risky move, one that could reignite old flames and affect your future and any plans you and your soon-to-be spouse may have made. Your ex should politely decline the invitation to attend your wedding–it is the right thing to do.
But, without provocation, you sent the invite. The ex won’t concede. This will probably happen:
WORLDS COLLIDE
As the wedding day approaches, you will be torn between two worlds:
One: The excitement and anticipation of beginning a new chapter with your soon-to-be spouse (the one you say you love).
Two: Lingering thoughts of your ex who once held a significant place in your heart and life (the one you still have feelings for).
It is no ordinary choice and will weigh heavy on your soul. If you let yourself get into past feelings, you will become melancholy, rationalize past situations and make faulty decisions.
As you walk down the aisle to your soon-to-be spouse and see your ex sitting/standing in the audience, your eyes will convey a mixture of emotions. What will your eyes show? Longing? Nostalgia? Unresolved fellings? Perhaps a hint of regret?
All attention will be on you (maybe the ex too). When memories of you and the ex’s time together flood your mind and heart, you will (for a few breif moments) reminisce about the love you once shared, the laughter, the tears, the intimacy, and moments of pure bliss.
Did you know body language is subconsciously influenced by feelings and emotions? Will your new spouse be able to read you? Will the wedding guests be able to read you? Your ex will be able to read you and know you are not over them – that’s one of the reasons they are at your wedding.
REALITY
Standing at the precipice with a new lover, new mate, new spouse, new life, new beginning, you shouldn’t want to start your new future with deceit, manipulation, distrust, and secrets and a marauding ex.
Conclusion
They are an EX for a reason. If the love was true, they wouldn’t be an EX. They aren’t standing at the alter with you for a reason.
Sometimes the lyrics of a song can help us see more clearly through those proverbial rose colored glasses we’ve been wearing. Here are three songs to begin with:
Bruno Mars, “When I Was Your Man”. “I should have bought you flowers and held your hand.”
Luther Vandross, “Give Me the Reason to Want You Back. Why Should I Love You Again?”
Beyonce’, made it clear in “Irreplaceable”. “To the Left. To the left.” Remember, you have found another in a minute.
OR
Will it be like Lenny Kravitz said, “It Ain’t Over, Till It’s over”?
Your choice.
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